Continuing from the previous post…

Ty struggles to read non verbal signals.? If Ty is talking excessively and you are bored out of your gourde ? he won?t notice.? If you attempt to ignore him to send the ?I am done? signal, he won?t register it.? (I actually watched Darin attempt to do that once and I laughed watching as Ty escalated his antics.? That was never going to work and I had to explain that later to Darin).? If you frown at something he says in an attempt to get him to quit his current course, he?ll never see it.??? If he says something rude and your expression suggests that he better be quiet immediately, I would recommend you save the non verbal clues and put words to your thoughts because he will not recognize your expression as a non verbal way of saying ?stop talking!?.? Because Ty has difficulty reading the emotions on your face, he can?t interpret them in a way that is going to lead to action on his part.

In an earlier section, I referenced the poor outcomes associated to Tanner and Ty playing legos together because I described they would each have a different agenda.? Tanner to build and get satisfaction out of his creation.? Ty to destroy (because things falling apart are funny to him).

There is even more to that then I earlier described.?? Because Ty doesn?t get the same sense of satisfaction from ?success? that Tanner does, he struggles to make sense of another person?s need for it.?? When Ty destroys something that Tanner worked hard on (or kills off his own character when they are playing on the same team thus causing him and Tanner to lose the game), he doesn?t understand how that makes Tanner feel because winning or creating is not on Ty?s scope.? If a person doesn?t feel a particular ?thrill of success?, it makes it difficult to applaud the efforts of others or even have any appreciation for their wins.? Ty?s ?attacks? on property or violation of game rules are often seen as intentional or mean spirited.? They are not.? More so, Ty has no idea that YOU perceived them as mean spirited and that doesn?t even make sense to him at all.

Have you ever had a conversation with someone and later found out that they had their feelings hurt by something?? Later in discussion with a listening ear, you relate that you are having trouble empathizing with the other person’s side because you cannot figure out for the life of you how they came to the conclusion they did in the first place??? If we find their position ridiculous, it makes it really hard for us to offer validation or empathy.? If Ty were to consider it (which he doesn?t), I think that would be a fair description of Ty?s side of things.?? Why should he feel bad that he just killed his character off thus causing Tanner and himself to lose the game?? Why did Tanner care about winning the game in the first place?? That wasn?t fun or interesting.? Killing the character was much more entertaining.? Ergo?no empathy.