(Picture taken in March)

My list of notes for future blog posts is getting long so I thought I would post an update this fine afternoon.

Tanner

Tanner celebrated his 11th birthday in May and I sure can tell my boy is growing up.?????? More and more my shy boy is coming out of his shell.?? (Clients will never believe this though because when he goes on shoots with me he says next to nothing the entire time).

When Tanner was about four, Jim and I were going CRAZY with Tanner’s refusal to answer direct questions.?????? We would ask his thoughts or opinions and he would give us a deer in the headlight look.?? To this day, you don’t ever want to ask Tanner to make an immediate decision.?? Having him shop on Amazon has been a lifesaver for us after too many trips painfully wandering store isles waiting for him to make up his mind.???? I will never forget an incident that occurred when he was about 4.?? We had asked him some opinion question at the dinner table and he wouldn’t answer us.?? We both got so frustrated (meaning Jim and I) that we finally sent him to the couch in the other room and told him he could return when he was ready to answer our questions.?????? We were determined to see it through so we let him sit there for quite some time.?? Finally, I couldn’t take it and went in to see him crying on the couch.?? I’ll never forget what he said to me.?? “Mommy!?? I have no finks in my mind!”

We laughed at that and gave up.?? What can you do when a person just has “no finks in their mind”??? Nothing.

So this phenomena has continued for all these years.?? Lately though, we are noticing a bit of a change that at times is rather disconcerting.???? Tanner, does, in fact, have an opinion.???? I have been surprised at how often he is engaging me in controversial dialogues.?? It is usually something simple and goes like this:

Me:?? Can you go get the orange juice out of the other fridge?

Tanner:?? There isn’t any out there.

Me:?? Yes there is.

Tanner:?? Nope.?? I was out there earlier and there is no orange juice in that fridge.

Me.?? I bought it this morning!?? TRUST ME.

Tanner:?? It’s not out there.

Me:?? Fact alert.?? It is.?? Get out there.?? Now.

In walks Tanner with a bottle of Orange Juice and big sheepish grin on his face.

I was telling Jim about this and we both covertly giggled because we are so thankful that he is finally speaking his mind but sometimes, let’s face it, it’s annoying.???? The other night I hear him talking with Jim about something and he disagrees with what Jim says.?? I grin and raise my eyebrows at my honey indicating that he is about to engage in a circular argument with Tanner and to pay attention so that he sees what I am going through all day.

Jim:?? Yes it is Tanner.

Tanner:?? No I don’t think so.

Jim:?? I am telling you it is.

Tanner:?? Are you sure about that?

He did not.?? He did not just say to his Dad “Are you sure about that?”.?? I cracked up.???? He turns 11 and this is what happens??? My boy is finally finding his FINKS!!!?? Isn’t that awesome?

Having said all this, I recently had a discussion with Tanner that I later regretted because I was WAY in the wrong.???? The week before Mother’s Day, I took the kids on a walk to the park.?? Tanner was on his bike and he fell on the asphalt and gouged a small hole in his knee.?? It did look pretty deep but it wasn’t bleeding that much.?? Tanner, has a notoriously low pain tolerance (red head thing) and I wasn’t taking it very seriously.?? I gave him the option to go back to the house but assured him he was fine.?? For days he complained about this knee and kept bringing it up and I kept saying “Good gracious it is just a little scratch.?? Your fine.”???? After a couple of days though, it started looking really red around the injury.?? Jim and I were keeping an eye on it because it just wasn’t looking right and we were starting to change our tune.?? On Mother’s Day, Jim had Tanner take a bath because it was now looking infected.?? We decided we were going to have to soften the scab and clean the infection out.?? (Uh…should have done that in the first place – bad mom).???? Jim sat down at the table with a pair of tweezers and noticed a black spot.?? I took a look and confirmed his suspicions.?? Asphalt in that hole.???? About that time Papa came to the door.?? All three of us were watching in horror as Jim dug around in the knee and realized the piece of pavement was huge.?? Way bigger than the hole.

Dad is saying “Jim your just going to have to yank it out!”

Tanner is crying.

I am cringing and remembering what my Dad did to me when I had asphalt in my arm and was OH so thankful for Tanner’s sake that Jim was the Dr. on call instead of his Papa!

Jim, Mr. Patience and Persistent, calmly worked at it until he removed a piece of asphalt that was the size of two BBs.

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Tanner is up over 40 wpm now with high accuracy.?? He is so proud of himself.???? I wrote a note about this on my blog notes and he saw me.

Tanner:?? Why are you writing that?

Me:?? Because I like to keep a record of things about my kids so I remember someday and that seemed like a good one.

Tanner:?? But that is not my record!?? My record is 43 words and 96 percent!

I had written 40/96.???? Such a first born performer.?? I wonder where he gets it?

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Another burst of extrovert moments I have been observing is Tanner’s interaction with Noah.?? They use fake accents all the time.?? They are hysterical.???? I heard him singing country music (it was Garret Hedlund’s Silver Wings if you must know) with Seth in the back of the car this week.?? He was singing out loud and strong and mocking the song as best as he could.?? Jim and I smiled away from the front seat and didn’t dare turn and look at him.

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Ty

Remember the whole sarcasm discussion??? We are making some headway.?? :)?? Here are two recent events:

Me (to Tanner):?? You are making absolutely NO progress on those dishes.

Tanner:?? I know.

Me:?? Thank you for validating that point Tanner.?? That actually does make me feel better.

Ty:?? HA!!!!!!?? YOU WERE JUST BEING SARCASTIC!!!!!

LOL.?? Nope.?? That time I was serious.

Then yesterday we were driving and Ty spilled his orange drink in the backseat and we had to pull over.

Jim:?? Awesome.?? (Said in a low grumble).

Ty:???? When Dad says “awesome” when something really bad happens, he must be being sarcastic.

RIGHT!!!?? I had to laugh at how he processes this.?? Also has occurred to me that Jim and I are sarcastic quite often so I guess we are giving Ty lots of opportunities to recognize clues of sarcasm.

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After a full day of the flu with Tori vomiting over a total of 15 hours and Tanner 8 hours, we all stared at one another wide eyed when Ty pipes up from the couch “I just love this place”.?? This said after eating a zinger in front of all of us.

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In the car listening to Casting Crowns At Your Feet…

Ty:?? MOM!???? Tori said that God is dead!

Tori:?? Well!?? He said that dying he saved me!?? (Song lyrics)

I explain.?? Then Ty gets onto the topic of age and how old I will be when he is different ages.?? He is obsessing about this and this has become a regular car discussion.

Ty:?? Well what about when I am 50?

Tori:?? I am 30 years older so I will be 80.

That doesn’t set well with him.

Ty:???? What will happen when your 100??? Who will take care of me?

(This question didn’t settle well with ME because wow that question is hard on a mother of a disabled child and I try to not let my mind go there because that is way too far out to consider).

Me:?? I will be dead Ty but you’ll be 70 so you’ll be okay.

Tori:?? You’ll be dead????????? Oh I am going to miss you when your dead!?? What are we going to do?

This is at least the third time we have had this discussion and it ends like this every time.?? They kill me off and then mourn and I sit there wondering how we got “here” again.

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Ty was talking to a woman at the mall the other day.

Woman:?? You have a grandmother!?? That is wonderful!?? Mother’s are great but Grandma’s are FROSTING!

Ty:?? Ya.?? My Grandma makes me cupcakes with frosting.

I had to laugh.?? He had no idea what to do with her comment but was trying quite hard to relate.

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For whatever reason, Ty and Tori have been wanting to talk about God a lot in the car and I am guessing it is the Casting Crowns CD that is often playing.???? The other day, out of no where Ty says “Mommy.?? I love God and I have a relationship with him.”

I know he is repeating portions of conversations that he and I have had lately but I also know that he is taking in these things because he keeps bringing them up of his own accord (and frankly, Ty doesn’t bring up very many topics outside of his usual three.???? The age talk and God talk are pretty outside his normal boundary).???? You wonder about these things when your a parent…what your child is processing and understanding and it’s on a whole different level when you have an ASPIE but God is showing me that He can speak to Ty just fine.?? :)?? So many things I have to learn to leave in God’s domain.

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I have been frustrated with Math lately.?? I love the program we use (Teaching Textbooks) but because Ty can’t write, he can’t cipher out the long addition, long subtraction, long multiplication, etc.???? Therefore, I have to write everything for him and wait on him to give me specific directions about where to put the number and what to borrow or carry (which frankly is tedious for me).?? I have searched and searched thinking there must be something that a person with a writing disability can use for math but haven’t been able to find anything.?? I finally searched under Drag and Drop Math (thinking that might be intuitive) and found this website: http://www.mrnussbaum.com/draggable/index2.html.

Finally a solution!!!?? It has an app for IPhones but since I am a droid user that doesn’t help me.?? Ty can use it on the computer though.?? The program allows you to drag numbers to the correct spots so that you can cipher the math without having to physically write.?? Awesome.?? I am surprised though that this is the only tool of this kind I have found so far.?? Anyone else know of anything????? Writing isn’t a big deal because Ty can type but math is a whole other issue because you have to line everything up.

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Last week Jim took the kids while I was doing a newborn shoot.?? While he was out with them, he noticed that Ty had removed the air vents from the Excursion ceiling in the backseat.?? Daddy was not happy.?? He spent a considerable time detailing just how unhappy he was.???? Jim HATES it when people mistreat things so Ty really pushed Daddy’s button big time with that bit of hooliganism.???????? At one of their stops, Jim was SHOCKED when Ty came around to his side of the car, looked up at him, and said “I am really sorry I did that.”???? Choked both of us up.???? Ty has NEVER EVER shown that kind of independent ownership over something E.V.E.R.?????? You wouldn’t think that hearing a simple apology would bring tears to both parents eyes but when you are raising kids with disabilities you celebrate everything and that was HUGE.?? I mean incredibly HUGE.?? We didn’t know if he would ever do that!?????? We are not going to count on it happening very often but the fact that it happened even once is so incredibly encouraging to us.

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Tori

And so begins the book….

Tori found out that Ty chose the name Sophie for her as a baby.?? She is asking to change her name.?? As if.

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I love how she says “WWWoooooohooooooo” in her girly girl teenage voice.

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I love how she takes care of Ty.

At IHOP…

Tori:?? Hey.?? You’ve gotta a little something there on your mouth.?? Let me clean it off for you.

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In her bed…

Tori:?? Mommy I need a rubber band (band aid) for my blister.

Me:?? I told you that if you wore those shoes again you would get a blister.

Tori:?? We went to the park and I put those shoes on and I got a blister and then I said “Mom.?? You are right.”

Music to my ears.

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While on a recent hike…

Tori:?? Oh no!?? I don’t see Daddy or the boys!?? They left us!

Me:?? Oh no!?? We don’t have food or water or anything!?? What will we do?

Tori:?? Well…..welll…..welll……………………………welll……..well………….We can scream.

Mostly she is powerful.?? Sometimes she is four and all girl.

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Speaking of trips (sort of)…

Today I was remembering back to a trip we went on when Tanner and Ty were small.?? We were spending a week at the Hyatt in San Diego because of a training thing Jim was attending.???? Not liking to pack and realizing that it took WAY too much luggage to pack for kids (including a baby), I decided to grab big backyard lawn trash bags and make my job simple.?? Just throw everything in there.?? Easy peasy.

When we got to the hotel and were toting a stroller loaded with a zillion lawn and leaf trash bags up to our room it then occurred to me that we looked rather shifty.???? Criminals engaging in nefarious crimes haul large trash bags in and out of hotel rooms.???? I then realized my mistake.?? It seemed like a good idea at the time.?? Live and learn right????? :)?????? (And now my sister in love Brooke is swooning with horror over what I just admitted to but I hope she takes notice of the nice pink bag that Quinn’s gift was wrapped in yesterday before judging too harshly. I have come a long way baby but I still think it makes way more sense to buy a larger gift than spend some of the budget on wrapping and cards that they could care less about.)

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Me:?? I am going to take a shower and you need to go to bed.

Tori:?? Can’t I please take a shower with you?

Me:?? Okay but the moment you get out of the shower, you need to put pajamas on and GET. IN. BED.

Tori:?? Oooooooorrrrrrrr I could take a shower with you, put on my jammies, and get in YOUR bed and watch some TV.

Me:?? There will be no counter offers.?? Take it or leave it.

Sheeeshhh.?? Every single day.

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Overheard her talking to Papa on the phone.

Tori:?? I made two piles.?? One for toys that I am going to save and one for toys that I am going to donate.?? I put all the crazy girls in the donate pile.

LOL!?? Don’t have any idea what that was all about but it was funny.

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While playing dolls with her…

Tori:?? My girl’s name is Victoria.

Me:?? Oh.?? Mine is Ellie.

Tori:?? Or how about Katie Perry?

Me:?? Okay.?? Katie Perry.

Tori:?? Well you have to ask my permission to change her name first.

Me:?? (Sigh).?? Tori may I change Ellie’s name to Katie Perry?

Tori:?? If you want to.

Seriously?

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Over Mother’s Day weekend I was still recovering from the stomach flu.?? My mom, feeling sorry for me called to check on me and I told her that Tori was telling her daddy that he needed to take her to the store because she had to buy a card with butterflys on it and she needed to buy me a cake.?? Sweetie decided she would do Tori’s shopping for her and cracked up when Tori gave her very specific directions that included a cake with pink on it.???? Awwwww….I love having a girl.

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While getting ready for bed.

Tori:?? Mom I need tissues in course if I blush.?? I sometimes blush in bed.

Translation:?? I need tissues just in case I sneeze.?? I sometimes sneeze in bed.

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After watching The Avengers…

Me:?? So who is your favorite Avenger??? Mine is Iron Man hands down.

Tori:?? Mine is Captain America!?? Hands up!

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“Mom??? We need to talk.?? Why do we always have birthdays on tomorrows?”

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Me:?? I am going to go take a shower.?? Do you want to come with me?

Tori:?? Your supposed to say ” WHOSE WITH ME?”

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While sitting at my desk listening to the kids cause all kinds of ruckus behind me.

Me:?? What are you kids doing in here??? Your supposed to be cleaning!!!

Tori:?? I am SAVING TY’S LIFE!!!!

I turn around and see her standing between her brothers with a foam rubber sword in her hand.?? Tanner has two squirt bottles aimed at Ty.

The knight on the white horse wears pink.

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Tori:???? Ty!?? You got PUNKED!?? BOOOOO YAAAAAAAA!

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Jim was giving me a sinus massage because I had a headache.

Tori:?? Mom can you try to stop doing that?

Me:?? Doing what?

Tori:?? Making that angry face.

Me:?? I am not angry Tori.?? I am in pain.

She watches awhile concerned.?? Finally she can’t abide a passive stance any longer and she marched to Jim and tears his hands off my head.

Tori:?? STOP DOING THAT!?? SHE CAN’T TAKE IT!!!!!

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While I am typing this…

Tori:?? I ate the goldfish.?? (Crackers)

Me:?? Oh.

Tori:?? Why don’t you say “OH!?? Maybe you WERE hungry!”

I love how she directs our dialogue.?? I think she was trying to get her point across that she had been starving for quite awhile before I finally gave her a snack.

She is hysterical.

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TROY

Years ago I heard a story about a family friend that has always stuck with me.???? A young toddler had started limping and his parents brought him to the Dr. only to discover there was not a thing wrong with his leg.?? Sometime later, they watched him walking behind his grandfather.?? He was imitating his Grandpa’s limp.

I was starting to get apprehensive about Troy because I was noticing that he was shaking his head back and forth often.?? I had mentioned it to my mom and she said that she she had seen it to.?? While at her house, he started it again while I was holding him.?? Suddenly, the light bulb went off.?? Ty was talking to him and Ty was ticking away.?? Troy was responding back to Ty but shaking his head in imitation.?? How did I not realize that earlier??? LOL.?? Ty’s tics are catchy.???? Funny.?? I can only imagine what Troy may imitate in the future.?? Yikes.

I am starting to get anxious for Troy to walk just so he will leave my end tables alone.?? Every time I go to set my drink down I am annoyed because my youngest has relocated our end tables all throughout the house.?? He is using them as walkers.?? They glide quite nicely across the wood floor.?? We are also realizing that he seems to be deliberate about his timing because he has been caught moving the table THEN going for the drinks and remote controls once he is out of mama’s reach.?? Today he made off with my dinner.

He will take one step between objects and can stand alone for a second but we are not quite there yet.

His word list now is as follows:?? Dadda, Mama, Hi, Up, Ya, Papa, Nigh Nigh

We laughed when we saw him break out dancing for the first time recently.?? It was to Bruno Mars Runaway.???? The rhythm got him and it was adorable.

I love how he puts his feet up on everything.?? If I am holding him at my desk, he kicks his feet up.?? If I am holding him at the table, he (rudely hee hee) puts his feet up on the table.?? He has done this since he was tiny.?? Not sure why but cute.

Eight teeth are now broke through and he looks as cute as can be.

Wheeeewwww… I think that is enough for tonight.???? Over and out.