Nearly everyone in my “inner circle” gets quite annoyed from time to time (or in some cases all the time) with my??”phone issues”.?? I hear constant complaints from friends and family members about my “Do Not Disturb” button, my “screening”, and my unavailability.???? My brother Daniel has resorted to singing.?? When my message machine picks up he begins to sing.?? He makes up his own songs and he will sing and sing and sing.?? He figures that if I am screening, I can only take so much of his singing before I feel compelled to pick up the phone.?? (As a point of fact, his music and lyrics are highly amusing to me).?? David and Dusty just yell ” I KNOW YOU ARE THERE!!!!?? ARE YOU PURPOSELY IGNORING ME?”?? Darin just doesn’t call.?? I think Darin hates the phone too :).???? I have a whole slew of other names to list but they may not want the spotlight on this topic LOL.

On average I have 23 to 25 messages on my phone at all times.?? Not because I get that many messages??a day, because I don’t sit and clear them everyday and then when I do, the number creeps back up to 25 before I know what hit me.

So what is my issue?

I am taking the time to write about this because I am not being understood here.????:) 🙂 :)?? Hoping for a little more public sympathy.??

I admit it.?? I HATE the phone.?? I have always hated the phone – my whole life.?? When I was?? young, I used to answer my parents phone “Grand Central Station how may I help you?”.?? True story.????With??5 children, you wouldn’t believe how many phone calls can occur in a day.?? It used to get me so frustrated that I would tell everyone “JUST BECAUSE??A PHONE RINGS DOES NOT MEAN YOU ARE OBLIGATED TO ANSWER IT”.?? So the real issue for me is simply….interuption.?? I don’t manage interruptions well.?? (Don’t confuse this with hating to talk to people – I love to talk to people and I LOVE YOU!)

The??average female multi tasker can manage a??phone conversation while feeding kids, changing diapers, cleaning house and many other general chores.?? Phone time makes “not so fun” tasks a little more??enjoyable.?? She gets so caught up in a day with little ones that she is in dire need of adult conversation.?? The phone ringing fills her with hope that maybe…just maybe…she can step outside of K-garten conversation and talk about something truly grown up.?? I get that 🙂

Unfortunately for my circle, I??am not the average female woman when it come to these things.

While I often joke about my inability to multi task, don’t make the mistake of thinking I am just kidding!?? This is a REAL issue.??I know I am a shame to??my gender over this but I truly can’t help it!

My weakness in this area gives me strengths in other areas though.?? Isn’t that usually the case with special needs? :)?? I may not be able to chew gum and walk but??when I set my mind??to do something, I can really concentrate on that ONE thing and end??up with an end??product that satisfies me??(usually) :).??

I hold myself to a high standard of achievement and the bar is always higher than I can climb to.?? This leaves me in a state of feeling frustrated, overwhelmed, and generally inadequate often.?? I do this to myself – I realize that.?? Lately my MUST be dones are as follows:?? My bible study, kids bible study, Tanner’s schoolwork, dishes done, meals cooked, laundry mostly caught up, house at least picked up, dressed and cute before Jim gets home :).?? I am trying to make sure that those things are done at bare minimum (this too can be hit and miss).?? Then I have a long list of other daily stuff that come after this and I rarely seem to get to it.?? Some women can have the above items done before lunch but not me.?? I am too easily distracted.?? Every little nuance (and there are plenty) – gets me off schedule.?? The other morning I decided to watch the last hour of Princess Daisy that I taped (why exactly did Grammy like that 3 hour miniseries?).?? I almost NEVER watch any daytime television but yesterday I was having a very off day and thought maybe quiet time would help.?? I turned on my show at about 9:00. Do you know what time it was when I finally finished it??? 2:30.?? How did it take me 5.5 hours to finish watching 1 hour of a program??? Interuption.??

Would it surprise you to hear that I actually “schedule” my phone calls??? If I pick up the phone to call someone, in all liklihood I had been planning that call for hours.?? I would make the call just before “this task” and right after “that task”.?? Mom gets more random calls because she and I can have 2 minute or less conversations but everyone else gets “scheduled”.?? Don’t take that as the bad news.?? The great part of that is I scheduled the call so that I COULD talk.?? One also has to figure the “kid factor” into this.?? Tanner and Ty are NOT on their best behavior when mommy is on the phone.?? They both know that they can get away with A LOT if I am on the phone and it feels they rush into trouble with glee as soon as I am distracted.????If I get on a longer call with someone, I live to pay for it and that taps me out for the day right there.?? 🙂

When I call you I don’t expect you’ll be available.?? I give it my best shot and if you are there great, if not, well, I’ll try again another time.?? But the worst thing for me is if I call you and you say “Hey can I call you back in just a few minutes?”???? That makes me hyperventilate :).?? Three people did that this week.?? Very normal thing to do.?? I do it to other people sometimes as well.?? Let me reiterate, there are VERY VALID reasons for suggesting this!?? However, in my case, you may hear me start stuttering when I have to answer your question.??

Example:??

It’s 9:30 and Ty’s still sleeping.?? I want to have Tanner’s schoolwork done by lunch because after lunch I have a list of other things I need to do.?? I know Ty will be up within 30 minutes but I probably have a 20 to 30 minute window for a phone call.?? I make my phone call, talk 5 minutes and my friend/family member say’s “Hey can I call you back?”.?? My heart races.?? Ty will be up in a minute.?? Then I have to start on schoolwork and I can’t interupt Tanner with phone calls during schoolwork because it is too frustrating for both of us.?? Do I sit by the phone and not start schoolwork until you call??? Maybe I could do something else for a few minutes while I am waiting??? I must start schoolwork by 10:00 though.?? Do I have time to download my bank activity??? What if you call when I am doing that??? I can’t do book work and talk on the phone either.?? Oh snap.?? Ty just woke up.

See the dilemma????? Chances are, if you call back I won’t answer.?? I will have moved on to another task and there is no going back because I can’t do both.?? I am a “one or the other” gal and short of taking ADD drugs;), I don’t suppose that will change anytime soon.??

This is also the reason I let my machine pick up for me most of the time.?? Unless I am in between tasks OR am doing something that would allow me to talk and task (which is unlikely) – than I just can’t manage the phone.?? I expect come Sept this issue will be magnified because I will be dedicating my whole morning to 1st grade.?? I didn’t write this post to say “stop calling” – I love your calls and your messages and your singing – I LOVE YOU.?? I just wish you could still hear “I love you” from me – even when I didn’t pick up your call or took forever long to return it.?? I do love you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!?? (I figure several people will assume that I am writing this to them so just go ahead and insert your name at the top LOL).

So are you more mad now or less mad??? Just checking.?? 🙂 :)?? If you have anything really negative to say, could you save it for my machine? ??LOL 😉 😉

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