Mama's Diaries

I Feel Pregnant

??Bounce??That catch your attention???

Okay here is a better way to phrase it “We are EXPECTING!”?? Okay – so NO I am not “literally” pregnant but our third child just MIGHT be conceived already and if he or she is, than it is perfectly fair for me to say we are expecting – don’t you think?

IT’S OFFICIAL??- WE ARE GOING BACK INTO THE ADOPTION MATCH BOOK THIS WEEK!?? YIPPPPPEEEE!!!!!!!

I just got my??”Dear Birthparent” letter finished this morning and I need to get it copied and then take it??to our agency and we are all set!??

Questions You May Have:

1.????Do we want a boy or a girl?

Don’t care.?? We will be happy with either (or both LOL)

2.?? Are we adopting an infant?

Yes.?? Because we are going through a private agency, we will be adopting an infant.?? Usually older babies or children go through Fost/Adopt programs and Jim and I do not want to participate in a Fost/Adopt because the risk is too high for reclaim.?? I am hoping to be in a situation where the birthparent is choosing to sever her rights as opposed to the state severing them.?? I think there is more risk involved when someone else makes that decision.?? The only way a birthparent could later attempt to reclaim if they signed their own relinquishment voluntarily is if they could prove there were coerced into signing (which is very uncommon and difficult to prove as well).

2.?? Do we want another open adoption?

We want what God wants but??have loved having such a wonderful relationship with Ty’s birthfamily.

3.????How long will it take?

The adoption agency typically says the average wait is 11 months but??that wasn’t the case with Ty and it CAN happen overnight.???? With Tanner, we were matched with??him within two months and??I had already been expecting for years and just didn’t know it.?? (He was frozen 3 years and four months before we transferred him).?? With Ty, we went into the matchbook in??July and Amanda actually conceived him in August.?? We were matched with him in December and he was born in January.?? Thankfully, Amanda chose us early in her pregnancy.?? Typically,??birthmom’s wait until the later half of the pregnancy which makes for a very short adoptive pregnancy.?? So…it could be over a year from now or it could be next week.?? You never know.

4.?? Are the boys excited?

Yes.?? :)?? They have been talking about another baby for awhile.??

This may be the only time you read about this before you see a “He/She is HERE” post.????Because my??blog is public and??therefore could be read by potential birthfamilies, I don’t want to talk??about specific situations on my website prematurely.???? I think I would prefer to wait until??the birthparents have relinquished all rights and baby is securely in our family before I talk about it in this forum.?? In AZ, birthmothers have to wait until the baby is 72 hours old before they can legally??relinquish.?? This relinquishment is permanent though.?? They don’t have??a 30 day window to change their mind like in some states.????This doesn’t mean they WILL relinquish at 3 days old but it means they can’t relinquish before then.?? Up until those relinquishments are signed, baby is not ours.?? Baby is theirs.?? As a result, I would need to protect their privacy.?? Therefore, I would expect that I won’t write about our baby here until he/she is at LEAST 3 days old.?? Just a forewarning.?? If you get curious along the way though, feel free to ask in a more private setting and I would be happy to keep you updated.??

I really do feel pregnant now!

Here is a glimpse of our birthletter:

??

admin

17 responses to “I Feel Pregnant”

  1. oh Doni!!!!!! I’m love your letter…. I about lost my vision trying to read it! Only got certain parts 🙂

    owwww I can’t wait to hear more about this new little one!!!! Just think the Lord already knows who it is! 😉

  2. That’s beautiful Doni!
    I’m sure it’s just the way it’s showing on my screen but it doesn’t have Ty’s name on the signature. Just wanted to make sure it’s there in real life. 🙂

  3. Doni and the whole family, Congrats and I wish you ALL the best. God Bless you all and the new addition too. Take Care and hope the wait is not to long, as we all know how much you all want a new addition to the family. This new little one would be so lucky to have this amazing family.

    Johanne

  4. Oh wow Laura!!!! GOOD EYE! It did cut off! Fixed in the original and thankfully it goes to print tomorrow so you caught in time for me. Yikes!

    By the way ladies, when I posted it, my intent was “presentation”. I didn’t size it to be read on purpose. LOL. Apparently I failed because some of you CAN read it. I don’t mind that you can…I just didn’t post it for that purpose. The Lord did have a a purpose though because apparently I needed an editor LOL!!

    Thank you for the encouragement. This process really makes one feel very vulnerable to be perfectly honest.

  6. while you’re on editing notes… did you ever try justifying the text on both sides? just an idea. 🙂

  7. Hey Doni!
    Congratulations! I do have to admit something I did when we were “expecting”. We were about a week away from our 1st son’s delivery/adoption, and were constantly running to Babies R Us for supplies. Well, in a hurry one time, I pulled into the parking space labeled “For Expectant Mothers”. My mother said, “Jana! You can’t park here!” I said, “I sure can! I can FINALLY park here!” I’ve been waiting 3 long years to park here!!” And, I did! It was so fun! I was expecting!! I’m so happy for you all! I’ll be praying for your birthmother.
    ~Mom to 2 adopted boys–Jacob(’03) & Nathan(’05)–and actually they are biologically half brothers–we were chosen to adopt our birthmother’s 2nd child as well.

  9. Congrats!!! I’m so excited for you and praying that the wait is not too long. AND, I’m with Heidi, I’m going to need a full copy of that letter myself. Too precious! If not the letter, then atleast share some of the pics of the four of you so I can hang them in my living room! Toooooo cute! : ) Fantastic job on the letter also. I’d pick you guys on the letter format alone 🙂

  11. Thank you ladies!!! Do you know what I am in the mood to do? Well, my mom always packed a suitcase in her last few weeks of pregnancy so everything was ready when the time came. I want to go shopping and pack a bag! I want to have a baby boy and girl take home outfit and jammies. Diapers, pacies, new bottle, formula….things I would need to get me through the first 48 hours. Chances are, we will be matched with a birthmom and know when baby is due BUT it is also possible we will get a call AFTER baby is born and be in a mad rush. If the later scenario is the case, I have good reason to be prepared. (Or maybe I just want an excuse to shop?). Not like it wouldn’t all be used eventually anyhow…..:)

  12. i’m totally with your reasoning and say GO SHOPPING! BRENDA SAYS SO TOO!!! PACK THE BAG! THIS IS THE SEASON FOR HOPE HOPE HOPE!!! 🙂

  14. It’s crazy to think that you could be a mommy again before me!!! I’m so excited for you all and can’t wait for the arrival of the newest Brinkman!! I’m thinking GIRL?!?!?!?! Only because little Meg, Kate, Joy….whatever her name is, is going to need a friend!

    And, if you need someone to shop with…PICK ME!!!! I’ve purchased NOTHING for this little girl yet! She needs a going home outfit, too! 🙂

  16. Doni, I have HAPPY TEARS! Oh what a joyous time! I agree with the other ladies — get that bag packed and GO SHOPPING!!!!!

    With both my babies being born early (25 weeks and 34 weeks) I never had a hospital bag packed…it was just something little that I have always wanted to do!! I had even planned on packing Morgan’s bag the day she decided to arrive!

    So go ahead pack that bag and I’ll live vicariously through ya!! I am so excited and am honored to be sharing in these moments with you.

    Love,
    Angela

  17. Happy, happy news! It’s a beautiful letter. I love it and it reflects the vibrant, loving family you are. Praying for your new little one and for you all as you now have the hard waiting part to do!

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